A Broke Writer's Vent

As an avid reader I have always dived into any book that tickled my fancy. Whether it be an Eric Jerome Dickey novel to a Jane Green novel or perhaps Dean Koontz and Stephen King and lets not forget my favorite author from childhood to present R.L. Stine. I am a lover of reading just about everything. Because of that I love to write about everything. I write science fiction, fantasy, horror, erotica, suspense all of which are my favorite genres. Despite the lover of all within me I can't find a fan base of my love for writing. I've been read all over the world by other fellow writers and readers per Circalit and Readwave. These sites gave me hope and the feedback was educational and promising. So why can't I find readers who have read my work from the E-Books I have on Amazon follow up with a review? Even a negative 'Hey I hate this book' feedback post I can't get. I'm flabbergasted on the lack of response I have received so far from all of the Facebook Friends I have who bypass my posts without a hint of  'I saw it and acknowledged it'. Maybe if I was to write about Divas and Thots or Hoodrats and Dope Traps would I get some acknowledgment of my writing then? Should I force myself to fit into the stereotype of what society has branded me as or shall I write what I love and actually know? I was even surprised that I got the hey you should use a pen name for your writing which I actually do. My author's name is D.E. Williams not my full name so therefore I am not an automatic face to name. But why was this even suggested? Will readers not enjoy my take on science fictional characters with extraterrestrial powers? I've tried everything from submitting works to magazines and entering into contests-for years still no hope. Maybe I'm no good at this. Maybe I should just save up a little and backpack it across the world until I find a common peace within my soul. Give up on writing...HELL NO! I won't...EVER. It is my passion. I love writing. Not telling the stories trapped in my head would drive me to insanity. So for now I vent and only because I can. With tons of papers sprawled all over my work station. I have plenty to type up and share with those who are willing to read what I write. Until next time...never give up...never surrender!

Why I write

My inspirations for writing has always been circled around my life and those that are a part of my life whether its for this season or the next.  When I first began writing, a dear friend of mine told me that my life was like a book and that was the first story I should write about. It sheds a light on the path we're on from beginning to end. When I was just a little girl, I began writing in journals. I  also loved to read because it gave me an opportunity to escape, to be free.  Every trial and tribulation that I have gone through has always and will always be my inspiration to write. Words inspire me. People inspire me. I love being creative and imaginative. Getting my feet wet in all genres of writing, has taught me that writing is in itself an inspiration. Everything and everyone that has been a part of my life has taught me a lot about myself. All of these things come together to inspire me to write compelling stories whether the stories are fiction or non fiction. Writing is a passion for me. I don't think I will be truly happy in life if I was told today or tomorrow that I should give up on writing and find another passion in life.  Every story, idea, debate, issue that has touched me in some way inspires me to write.

Black Creek is available to order and download to your mobile devices, laptops and or computers for $2.99. Also Check out the link to my author's page on ‪#‎Amazon‬ http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B00ZYVQLP8. Here you will find updates and giveaways. You don't want to miss out when the print copy comes out. 😁 Remember with Kindle Unlimited you can read it for free! Check out the excerpts! Black Creek is a paranormal science fiction read with a lot of mysterious beings, dark magic, parallel doors to other worlds and a few steamy scenes to sink your teeth into. You don't want to miss this read. Don't forget to read and leave a review, positive or negative I appreciate all feedback! smile emoticon $2.99 for E-BOOK download or free on Kindle Unlimited.

Proofreading and editing stages of Black Creek

Right now I'm near the end of the proofreading and editing stage for my novel Black Creek. I am happy to have accomplished such a great task- 75k words which is the first for me. Most of my writing projects consisted of short stories, flash fiction, poetry, articles, and screenplays 1-5 pages for contests. I can't wait to share with readers who may like or not like the novel because feedback is what I crave for the most. I have been writing for such a long time and though I can monitor how many clicks, how many readers, and or people reached I get very little feedback. Good or bad I'm still unsure. I'm looking to self publish first and have special offers to gain a reader base. Looking forward to the days ahead as a published novelist and even though I'm not starting out in the traditional form I hope to one day work with a literary agent with my future writing projects.

Reflecting Everyone has a story to tell. For some of us reflecting on what was is a lot harder to do than we thought.

"Eighteen years of imprisonment, eighteen years of slowly killing myself, hurting myself...insecurities. Sex became a void filled with negativity. No breathless satisfaction only breathless regret. I look at this list, tears build up. An overwhelming emotional guilt trip begins, the tears fall. I am without hope, without love. Hope and love has been replaced by pain and sadness. I'm a wrecking ball, breaking down the walls around me."

Yeah so this is the ish I came up with when reflecting on my dating life...sucks right? Way to depressing...seems like on the outside it is so easy for me to laugh about the craziness of the men I have run into. The situations I've encountered. My journey, though a great learning experience, I have yet to actually learn from any of it. Sad but true. I was trying to see the humor side of things but I have fallen short. I have no passion to write about myself...my love life and or lack there of and or dating life and again, lack there of. It's really too damn depressing to write about. I wouldn't know where to start to make it appealing enough to be more than a drag per the everyday bullshit of a Black Woman dating with all of the crap I have been through. I realize my troubles stem from a much more deep rooted problem and that has always been the underlying cause of my failed relationships. I would rather not dredge up that part of my life. So where and or how do I begin?

To begin the process of learning who I am, finding out where and how my life began to crumble, I decided to write up this list. A list consisting of past relationships, one night stands, friends with benefits etc. The list is really saddening. I mean here I am creating a list of sexual partners I've had in the last 18 years of my life and half of the list of names are nicknames and or descriptive words based on what I can recall about the guy I laid down with. As I write this list out I am literally cursing under my breath. Shaking my head and thinking, do I really want someone else to read this? Am I this comfortable with opening up my life for other people to judge me? The list of men I've been with only a few of them I would ever consider being in a relationship with. The others were one night stands and or friends with benefits.

As I am typing I begin reading the words in a Facebook message from a guy on my list. “So I do know you maybe not as well as I should. That's what makes you so beautiful to me though.” I only cringe at what I assume to be heartwarming words... considering he's now married. Sad but true and then I reply: “Maybe I'll find someone who will think of me that way. Someone that will matter in my life that is, or one day when I am older or hell in another life.

My lack of better judgement with men and my sexual lifestyle at no ones fault but my own has led me down a bitter and jaded path. I write this and sigh with sadness. Writing helps me breathe. I will find a reason to write. To end this madness so that I can begin.

Night Love An About Last Night poem

The night air so clear and crisp.

Cool winds blowing against my face.

The way he wraps his arms around me pulling me closer into a tight embrace.

It's so lovely the way we are.

I can't imagine being anywhere else.

How did I manage before?

I'm in deep thought, he stares into my eyes, he smiles and so do I.

No words are spoken. He knows what I'm thinking without me saying it.

I am wondering will this last forever?

My heart skips a beat and for a second I jump, startled by his kiss to my cheek.

His fingers trace the curve of my lips, my chin and my neck.

I whisper "touch me like this always" and his eyes tell me he will.

A Writer's Journey- Is it really a dog eat dog world?

"It's often said that everyone has a novel inside of them and in most cases that's where it should stay" A comment posted after reading probably my last article on "The Guardian" website. Most of the comments are negative and posted by other so called 'proclaimed writers' whom has a knack for going straight for the juggler when offering what I assume to be constructive criticism-yeah right. "Have you read this crap?" Per a comment left on an article discussing Amanda Hocking's success as a self published writer. These comments appear to be a review of the article and or the author mentioned. Articles discussing writers whom has by the way become a success despite their struggles to complete a writing project with restless nights of late night writing, completed projects then rejection letter after rejection letter to countless literary agents and or publishers yet to have found their success at getting published through self publishing. The comments lack class whereas the posters seem bitter and can you say jealous much? It's sad that some get a kick out of stomping on a dream. To think that artists such as writers would be supporting one another especially when reading on any level should be appreciated. Hello...hence the take over of reality tv as being one's choice of entertainment vs picking up a book to read. Sometimes I get discouraged reading negative comments flooding the sites like 'The Guardian' a site that I thought was for writers. A site that offer ways to getting published, information on marketing your book and success stories of writers and authors such as the one mentioned above. Having written only a few short stories and screenplays for review and contests I have stories to tell and I'm going to tell them. Becoming a success story or not I love to write. I'm not going to let bitter writers, and or those negative people who like stomping on a dream keep me from accomplishing what I want to do in life which is--WRITE. Every writer's story won't be a tale every reader wants to read. Every writer won't be a Pulitzer prize-winning author. That's the upside to writing because somewhere out there someone will enjoy your story. Would it matter that it didn't result in a book deal? Became a self published success? Realizing that I'm going to take on the mentality of-- Write for you and if they love it or hate it, you would have accomplished something others could never imagine doing.